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    psychological aspectFor the first time the term “man cave” appeared in the famous book by John gray ” Men are from Mars, women are from Venus”. However, the question was not about a specific space in the house, but about the personal space men in General.

    Russian sitting in the garage, fishing trips, hunting or just a barbecue in a purely male company — domestic ways men break from family life. But the closest analogue to the “man cave. ” » in Russia — garage: in Soviet times, there was often dragged the fridge, put the radio and installed bookshelves. Of course, to crush a bottle of men from a nearby garages were sacred duty of the common man.

    The psychological aspect

    On the topic of what still needed “men’s den”, today written entire scientific treatises and books from the category “pop psychology”. The authors agree on one thing: men need a secluded personal space. However, views on why this space needs, opinions differ.

    Some psychologists believe that the creation of his “dens” men are beginning to deal with stress, who experience when they are married. Someone, maybe just not ready for a life together with another person, with nostalgia remembering the student’s hostel in the College or his bachelor apartment.

    Others believe that it is not gender differences, and in the peculiarities of the psyche of a single person: the introvert’s easier to cope with stress alone, while an extrovert finds a solution, telling one and all about her troubles.

    There is a theory that the boom of mankelow is associated with the emancipation of women, who increasingly are not only equal to men, but superior to them in the classroom, hitherto considered exclusively male.

    Indeed, some 60 years ago married women all my free time spent in the kitchen or took care of offspring. Just look at any American film of the 1950s: men smoke cigars in the living room, while the missus one of them is fussing in the kitchen and brings them drinks.

    While women were fighting for their emancipation, maximum independence, and so forth, their “I’-the concept became clearer, while the male “I” concept is increasingly blurred. But for the average male is still a need to maintain their masculinity and in the creation of any supports for own “I”.

    Endless pressure, first from parents and then his own family drives a man to certain limits: you — getter, you ’ support. At the same time, his wife may have already in no way inferior and AU-go-go where he climbed the career ladder. But the remains of the old concepts do not give the man a rest and need to earn more than it, in order to protect your self-esteem.

    Add to that the “home comfort”, which is engaged in creating a spouse and in which often the man simply has no place where he could hide and enjoy their favorite activities without oblique views of the second half, which is then in principle so well, because she’s in their territory.

    Therefore, in order to survive without destroying the family hearth, the man is often necessary for a sanctuary where he could clean the gun, play with toy soldiers, and maybe to do ikebana — not necessarily in his cave he will do something purely brutal, the main idea is that he will do something alone, without the pressure and comments. The main thing is that in this territory the man was as comfortable as possible. This can be a garage, and — in the Russian realities — perhaps giving that spouse is not just endlessly build, and the idea of eternal construction is the embodiment of his dreams.

    Olga Miloradov

    psychiatrist-psychotherapist